Saturday, July 31, 2004
i'm in an odd mood right now...not bad...just odd. I've started missing really random people. People with whom, in the past, I've not been really close. I'm finding sources of comfort in the most unlikely people and places. but anywho
I went to Denny's with Katie tonight. Haven't actually sat down and talked with her in a good long while. She's a good kid.
I've been talking to Lauren a whole lot online as of late. She's usually the only one online at 2am, and she's great fun to talk to. She's been very helpful in my dealing with a lot of personal issues, and she has really touched my heart in the past couple of weeks. Sometimes ya just need someone to just sit down a listen. not offer advice or solace really.....just to listen and encourage. She has meant a lot to me as of late.
"I've heard it said
That people come into our lives for a reason
Bringing something we must learn
And we are led
To those who
help us most to grow
If we let them
And we help them in return
Well, I don't know if I believe that's true...
Because I knew you, I have been changed for good"
Thanks for everything babe, its meant a lot to me
ok....what else...if ya get a chance, watch
The Dangerous Lives of Alter Boys... its fabulous.
ha, funny story!
today at work, it was the last day for 2 of the girls working, so they were wanting to break the rules somehow, but they couldn't think of what to do. I suggested that they shrink wrap random things...and they did...and i mean the most random of things. the tape dispenser, they took every pen but one in the entire store, put them in the pen box, and shrink wrapped it. the rope dividing the behind-the-desk area from the rest of the store, shrink wrapped. and other random things. it was hilarious.
mmkay, well i think im gonna try to sleep now....its 4:30am
"What exacerbates the problem is I'm at these parties. I'm the center of attention. I'm the grand fromage, and here she comes:"Let's get a cup of coffee. Will you look at my manuscript?" And I'm showing her my left hand. I'm gesticulating with my left hand and then WHOOMP! There's Cathy! 'Cause she knows (They always know) and there's that really awkward moment where I try to show I wasn't encouraging this (Though of course I sort of was) and I don't want to look whipped in front of this woman, which is dumb - I shouldn't care what she thinks since I can't fuck her anyway!" ---from
The Last 5 Years
Some New Tsuris
3:52 AM
Wednesday, July 28, 2004
Wow.... I just watched one of the most powerful movies I have ever seen today. Its a movie called
City of God. Its about the druglords and street gangs in Rio De Janero, Brazil. Check the movie review page (under the Awesome Sites tab) in the next couple days for a more in depth review/summary.
Some New Tsuris
4:31 PM
Saturday, July 24, 2004
Stab me
So I can remember how to bleed
Starve me
So I know how to feed
Hurt me
So I don't forget to cry
Kill me
So I know how to die
Lie to me
So I never trust
Neglect me
So I remember to rust
Drop me
So I'm never above
Hate me
So I never feel loved
Play me
So I can say I've been used
Beat me
So I can feel abused
Break me
So I have a wound to nurse
Damn me
So I can feel cursed
Make me miserable
and prove that you care.
Make me hate you
and show that you'll always be there
Some New Tsuris
3:59 AM
A few words to describe how I'm feeling...and a few filler words
detatched
deleted
exhausted
defeated
derranged
delusional
confused
institutional
defiled
disenchanted
untouched
unwanted
unscathed
underestimated
underappreciated
decimated
depressed
deceive
confessed
conceived
miserable
mystery
invisible
history
Some New Tsuris
3:45 AM
Thursday, July 22, 2004
I just got home from working my 2nd 10 hour shift in a row, so I'm exhausted....so I'm gonna post some song lyrics that are on my mind
Wicked Little Town
from Hedwig and the Angry Inch
You know, the sun is in your eyes
And hurricanes and rains
Blacken cloudy skies
You're running up and down that hill
You turn it on and off at will
There's nothing here to thrill or bring you down
And if you've got no other choice
You know you can follow my voice
Through the dark turns and noise
Of this wicked little town
Oh Lady Luck has led you here
And they're so twisted up
They'll twist you up, I fear
They're pious, hateful, and devout
You're turning tricks 'til you're turned out
The wind so cold it burns
You're burning out and blowing 'round
And if you've got no other choice
You know you can follow my voice
Through the dark turns and noise
Of this wicked little town
The fates are vicious and they're cruel
You learn too late you've used
Two wishes
Like a fool
And then you're someone you are not
And Junction City ain't the spot
Remember Mrs. Lot and when she turned around
And if you've got no other choice
You know you can follow my voice
Through the dark turns and noise
Of this wicked little town
Actually, thats the only one I'm going to post...goodnight
Some New Tsuris
2:12 AM
Wednesday, July 21, 2004
So I'm sitting in my room, and I glance over at my
Rent poster, which is hanging just to the left of the window next to my computer. In the bottom, left hand corner is the orangish-yellowish picture of Adam Pascal as Roger, and he's holding his head in his hands and just staring forward with this empty look in his eyes, and all I can think is "I know what you're feeling man...." I mean sure, my girlfriend didn't just commit suicide after giving me AIDS or anything, but just the feeling of not having any direction, ambition, or reason is something to which I am totally relating. I feel like such a chump feeling sorry for myself. I have a relatively good life. I have parents who support me, I have friends who at least seem to genuinely care about me, and things on the whole go my way, but I'm still hurting.
"I dont' own emotion...I rent."
Special thanks to the following:
- Norbert Leo Butz, Sherie Renee Scott and Jason Robert Brown for the cast album of The Last 5 Years
- Jonathan Laron, and the OBC of Rent
- Lauren, a.k.a. Glinda, for always keeping my online company late at night
- Bradley Nowel (R.I.P) and Sublime for writing the song "What I Got"
- Stephen Trask and John Cameron Mitchell for writing Hedwig and the Angry Inch
- Seth McFarlane for writing Family Guy
- Matt Groening for writing Futurama
- Cartoon Network for broadcasting Adult Swim
"Have I told you today how lucky I am to be in love with you?" --- Norbert Leo Butz in The Last 5 Years
Some New Tsuris
12:34 AM
Monday, July 19, 2004
so its a week later, and my tongue infection is all cleared up now. My tonsils are still a little swollen, but they dont hurt anymore, so thats good.
I'm now the proud owner of a giant, flashing "Now Showing" movie poster marquee!! Since my store is completely renovating, they were just gonna throw it out. So I asked the manager if I could have it, and she said yes. How cool is that? Really cool!
So its been an interesting week. Debauchery, infection, drugs (of the legal nature), alcohol, cigars and cigarettes, and Slim Fast. Can you GET much better than that? Nope, ya can't.
Some New Tsuris
5:51 PM
Monday, July 12, 2004
ok so the "shitty week" award goes to...ME! AND IT JUST STARTED!!
yeah, so yesterday (Sun.) I woke up and for some odd reason, I couldn't swallow without extreme pain. So went into the bathroom and looked into my mouth in the mirror and saw that my tonsils had almost swollen my throat shut. that=distressing. so my mom took me to St. Mary's Convenient Care, and we waited about an hour for the doctor. Well the doctor was there for a total of 5 minutes, and then wrote me prescriptions for antibiotics and such. Well I spent most of yesterday asleep/watching TV in bed.
This morning I woke up and my throat felt a lot better. However, the tonsil infection spread onto, get this, my tongue. I have a giant infection on my tongue. How disgusting is that? It hurts so fuckin' bad. I haven't eaten anything in 2 days. I've been kept alive on Slim Fast shakes. it sucks.
so, if you've called me, and I haven't answered or called back, its because talking, right now, is very painful. hopefully this will all be gone in a couple of days. hell and damnation.
Some New Tsuris
10:43 PM
Friday, July 09, 2004
Stolen from an IMDB post board
You've watched too many Kevin Smith movies when...
- You fear and respect the escalator
- The ending of Return of the Jedi doesn't settle well with you anymore
- The theme to "Mighty Mouse" gets you sexually excited
- You almost laugh whenever someone asks what a Nubian is
- The phrase "f**k them up their stupid a**es" fills you with murderous rage
- You're aware of the gay subtext of Archie comics
- You liked the idea of a Bluntman and Chronic movie
- You, if given the chance, would ask Stan Lee for advice on women
- You hang around in airports to watch mankind at its best
- You know and enforce the difference between an eatery in the food court and an autonomous unit for mid-mall snacking
- You understand and use the term "finger cuffs"
- You've said "snootchie bootchies"
- When a woman tells you she's a lesbian, you don't see how it changes your chances of sleeping with her
- You've been to a topless fortune teller
- You always check to make sure the person you're about to have sex with in an unlit bathroom is, in fact, alive
- You claim to have a cousin named Walter
- You buy Alanis Morsette CDs with the hope that it will help you get into Heaven
- You know how much an average jizz-mopper makes an hour
- You've spit water on people just to make a point
- You doubt the validity of newspaper announcements
- You've rented weird porn to "expand your horizons"
- You've considered naming your cat "annoying customer"
- You consider the Universal Studios tour, when Jaws pops out of the water, to be the most romantic place to propose marriage
- You want Mr. Toad's Wild Ride, just like everyone else
- When you hear the word "uncomfortable" you automatically think "back seat of a Volkswagon"
- You take a Magic Eye very seriously
- You've considered stink-palming someone OR you've asked someone if they want a chocolate-covered pretzel
- You, suprisingly, know about likeness rights
- You consider the word 'tracer' vulgar
- Whenever you see a painting of The Last Supper, you wonder where Rufus was sitting.
Some New Tsuris
4:49 PM
Sunday, July 04, 2004
I'm a sell-out. Actually, I'm still really irked at my parents so I'm holing up in my room until other people arrive for the cookout. I'm just doing this to kill time.
Bold for movies you've seen
Italics for movies you have partially seen
Add three more at the end that you have seen
01.
Trainspotting
02.
Shrek
03. M
04.
Dogma
05. Strictly Ballroom
06.
The Princess Bride
07. Love Actually
08.
The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring
09.
The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers
10.
The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King
11.
Reservoir Dogs
12.
Desperado
13.
Swordfish
14.
Kill Bill Vol. 1
15.
Donnie Darko
16. Spirited Away
17. Better Than Sex
18.
Sleepy Hollow
19.
Pirates of the Caribbean
20. The Eye
21.
Requiem for a Dream
22.
Dawn of the Dead - the original, George Romero-directed film, that is
23. The Pillow Book
24.
The Italian Job
25.
Goonies
26.
Baseketball
27.
The Spice Girls Movie
28.
Army of Darkness
29.
The Color Purple
30. The Safety of Objects
31.
Can't Hardly Wait
32. Mystic Pizza
33.
Finding Nemo
34.
Monsters Inc.
35.
Circle of Friends
36.
Mary Poppins
37.
The Bourne Identity
38.
Forrest Gump
39.
A Clockwork Orange
40.
Kindergarten Cop
41. On The Line
42.
My Big Fat Greek Wedding
43.
Final Destination
44.
Sorority Boys
45.
Urban Legend
46. Cheaper by the Dozen
47.
The Crow
48. The Princess and the Warrior
49. Seabiscuit
50. Hard Core Logo
51. Phantom of the Paradise
52. Zardoz
53.
Lost in Translation
54.
American Beauty
55.
Big Fish
56.
Starship Troopers
57. Starship Troopers 2
58.
The Lost Boys
59. All About Eve
60.
Showgirls
61. Swept Away - The remake with Madonna
62.
Fight Club
63.
Frida
64. Lucia y el sexo
65.
The Negotiator
66.
Usual Suspects
67. Ordinary Decent Criminal
68.
Ringu
69.
Nosferatu (the original silent film)
70.
The Boondock Saints
71. Secretary
72.
Legend
73.
Repo Man
74. Sexy Beast
75. The Seventh Cross
76. Fatherland
77.
Harry Potter and the Sorcerers Stone
78. Princess Mononoke
79. Cannibal the Musical
80.
Lilo and Stitch
81.
Star Wars
82.
High Fidelity
83. Harry Potter and the Prizoner of Azkaban
84.
Girl Interrupted
85.
Ed Wood
86.
What's Eating Gilbert Grape
87. Gummo
88.
Sling Blade
89.
Robin Hood Prince of Thieves
90.
Amelie
91.
Bowling for Columbine
92. Crossroads
93.
A Goofy Movie
94.
Emperor's New Groove
95.
Clerks
96.
Rocky Horror Picture Show
97.
The Sound of Music
98.
Seven
99.
The Blues Brothers
100.
Halloween
101.
The Thomas Crowne Affair - Pierce Brosnan
102.
Fried Green Tomatoes
103.
Life of Brian
104.
Memento
105. Run Lola Run
106.
The Royal Tenenbaums
107.
Mulholland Drive
108.
Igby Goes Down
109.
Dr. Strangelove
110. In America
111.
UHF
112.
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
113.
Pulp Fiction
114.
Party Monster
115.
SLC Punk!
Some New Tsuris
1:00 PM
ya know, its ironic. Today is July 4th, Independance Day. I live in a house with very "patriotic" parents. However, we just had a huge argument about how I don't want to go to church anymore because I don't believe what my parents believe. They then went on to say that if I was going to live in their house then I have to go to church. Hmm....didn't this happen once before in history? oh right, when England said that the English had to practice the same religion as the government or face persecution. hmm... isn't that why this country was formed? at least partially. ironic don't ya think? I'm living with Torquemada...the grand inquisitor. Perhaps there will be an auto-da-fe` today or something...that would be fun. (If you don't understand the reference, just ask me....)
2 months.....2 months......2 months.....2 months.....2 months...... til I move out
Some New Tsuris
12:44 PM
